Ok, the entire China adopt world is in a frenzy over the new Chinese Barbie. She is beautiful, and my fingers are itching to pop over to Amazon and type in my credit card number. You even get a two for one deal!
There's only one thing wrong with this picture....
Madeleine would have her stripped and thrown on the pile of 25 naked Barbies that already live in her room in the special Barbie Box (from Walmart, plastic storage bin) in about three minutes.
Oh yes, I should put it up for her. Make her understand that it's a special collector's item. Um, yeah, let me take another hit off the pipe. Pass it over.
Trying to make a 7 year old stay out of a closed Barbie box is, well, let me say that I've had more luck getting Roger to wear bows in his hair. Her Going Home Barbie (a special Barbie that you get if you stay at a special hotel in China while adopting. It is a blonde Barbie with a tiny Asian child) went Home To Jesus this summer. I had it at the top of her closet behind two large boxes and this 40 pound child dragged a chair over to the closet, moved the boxes, retrieved GHB, opened the box, cut the plastic ties with her Safe Scissors, and GHB joined the rest of her 25 naked compadres in the Barbie Box.
So.
That leaves Meredith. Yesterday I pulled her onto my lap and kissed her shiny hair. I asked her a question. I said:
"Meredith, do you want a Chinese Barbie for Christmas?"
She replied:
"Mother, why do you persist in this tireless effort to have me identify with my biological gender? I have adequately and thoroughly demonstrated my total lack of affinity with the traditional feminine attributes, i.e. to wit: makeup, dresses, sparkly things, tiny pretty dolls, curly hair, bows, lace, ruffles. I beg you to simply consider this: I am an individual with very specific and identifiable tastes. If it's a tank, a truck, a gun, or Bob The Builder, I'm all over it like white on rice. If it bears the slightest resemblance to an object traditionally identified with the feminine gender, I categorically and vigorously reject it. You cannot order a child who will fulfill your very traditional 'girly' fantasies off Amazon the way that you would order the Chinese Barbie. "
Wait. Give me another hit off the pipe.
Actually her reply was:
"No."
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13 comments:
Same here. I even have a drawer full of Barbie parts, I don't know what for.
Pass the pipe.
Here, here. Destroy all symbolism. Your girls have the right idea!
I hate to play favorites, but damn it. Meredith rules.
--jane
I succumbed. I ordered the darned thing. Half of it is that I want the dotter inundated with dolls that are NOT blond/blue-eyed. The other half of it is, damn, I do like fancy dolls...so she gets one, I gt the other. Har.
Yep, I got two, one for each little Chinese princess. What can I say, I'm a Mattel slut. Ask Plum Blossom Mulan, Princess of China Barbie, Going Home Barbie, et al.
I don't know which little girl I like better! Is it the one who rapidly ruins the doll and then throws it away? Or the one who refuses to respond to girly stuff, strong enough to respect her own preferences? Tough one...great girls! (Beth D. from Maud-L)
Oh sheesh, just get them for yourself - clearly you are the one that wants them.
Prom, you're right. Although it gets even more ironic. I hated Barbies as a child, but somehow I love the idea that I have a child who loves Barbies. Yes, I am deeply twisted!!
I actually debated getting one just to display in the living room/playroom, but it would be cruel to tempt Madeleine with it.
I love their personalities.
Now, pass the pipe alllllreeeeeadddddy!
Marla
Give in, Lorrie. You know you want one.
Buy it for yourself and hide it with the cleaning supplies - kids never go there, even when they're teenagers like mine and are supposed to go there.
You're a witty blogger!
It's a bit late to comment, but I loved this post..
I kept trying to get myself to like Barbies when I was little, but I'm afraid I was too much like your daughter..
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