Lesson Learned

Madeleine got the rejection letter this week.

She failed to get into the Sooper Genyus Art Camp. "Competition was fierce," read the letter. "More than 500 kids auditioned for 50 positions. We wish you the very best in all of your future endeavors."

She took it well. She had to play a piece, do simple exercises with the violin, and answer questions posed to her by three strangers.

She made a mistake on her piece and they cut her off in midstream. I told her to play a simple piece perfectly, not try a piece she didn't know by heart and screw it up, but we hired a private tutor for her and he talked her into a piece that I fear was beyond her abilities unless she had practiced it far more diligently than she did. She took First Chair at the school orchestra without practicing--she plays with the USC orchestra on Thursday nights without practicing--why practice?

She also had to answer questions and she is terribly, terribly shy. This is not me. At that age I could have engaged three adults in a conversation without breaking a sweat. I was born without a shy bone in my body. When I'm "on stage" I come alive. I am great at standing up in court and arguing for my client or teaching a class. Being an actress never interested me though. I took Acting 101 in college just out of curiosity and realized that there were bad actresses--and then there was me. I still remember playing Emily from Our Town in a sketch and realizing that if you could rate acting talent in negative numbers, I'd be a winner.

Lesson learned--maybe? Takes more than talent, it takes WORK.

Brilliant children are showered with praise, encouragement, awards, doting teachers etc. ....and they never have to lift a finger. Madeleine can read an assignment once and make 100 on a test the next day. Study? What is that? She missed a few questions in 3rd grade, when the tests started to get more intense, and explained that she had "short-term memory loss." I nodded my head sympathetically and suggested that this terrible disease could be cured by studying. It didn't take. She hardly sat down during the awards program that year--Best Speller, Best Overall Third Grade Student, Best Behaved, yawn. The year before her school had stopped spelling bees since Madeleine won them every time and the other kids gave up trying.

Meredith brings home Best Behaved, Most Compassionate, etc. awards (they don't start grading them till 3rd grade in the public school) and Madeleine brings home countless Honor Student awards. Our refrigerator is covered with them.

HOW can you explain to a child like this that getting ahead in life requires WORK?

This might have done it. Maybe.

I haven't said anything. I haven't said "Told you so," although it took heroic control to keep my yap shut. As she advances into 6th grade next year, more failures lie ahead. And this is one lesson that she is going to have to learn the hard way.