Hello from South Carolina, where I am staggering around in a Benadryl-induced coma, stopping to jam a few more pink pills in my mouth and stagger off, huffing and sniffling, back to a prone position. It's pollen season, and little tiny yellow bits of pollen are covering everything.You guys have made the Young Author above very happy with your comments. She has "created" another "work" (her words) and is after me to post it on the blog. Get yer own blawg kid. Actually she has one already and I'll post her future "works" over there with a note when they go up.
Yesterday upon arriving home from school her first words to me were, "Mom, do I have any new comments?"
Today however I have to write about something that has taken possession of me, tormenting my nights and days. A vision of my children (or, even worse, ME) in the middle of this scenario on a school sponsored field trip...
A literate friend, who graciously allowed me to quote (steal from) her, writes:
So we went out of town this weekend to see family. It turns out the hotel was almost full of boys/chaperones who were there for some sort of baseball tournament. The boys were probably 13-14.
We tried to swim in the early morning and then again at night but at night it was almost impossible because of the behavior of the baseball kids. The pool was 4'9" deep at the deepest part. The kids were diving, which was against pool rules. One night, the three adults responsible for 20 or so kids at the pool were doing shots of tequila. And the next night they were consuming large amounts of beer. Glass bottles everywhere. Kids running. Kids throwing stuff in the pool. Open containers of beer and liquor left sitting everywhere in the public spaces in the hotel. The hotel didn't sell alcohol so these people shipped it in. At one point I saw one of the coaches wheeling in a cart with five large cases of beer on it. There weren't that many adults even in the group so I had to wonder about whether the kids were getting any of it. It seemed like a lot of alcohol for the adults we saw to be consuming. I don't drink at all, ever, so I have no perspective on how much is a lot. But it sure seemed like a lot of alcohol to me. The women doing the shots of tequila were petite and it seemed like for their size they were consuming a lot. They were pretty giggly and wobbly when they tried to leave. And they were the ones in charge of the kids.
We had kids running in the halls all night. No apparent curfew. They were playing some sort of dodgeball game in the parking lot with a basketball and no adult present. Throwing balls at parked cars. We couldn't get on the computer in the business center because the boys were in there trying to find porn sites that weren't blocked.
We complained about all of this to the hotel staff but they said it wasn't their problem and there was nothing they could do about any of it. I'm going to take all of this up with the hotel's corporate office today.
But....meanwhile....my question for the group is, how representative do you think this group was for a typical chaperoned trip with 13-14-year-old kids. We saw numerous behaviors where someone could have been seriously hurt including the diving, all the glass bottles at the pool, and the kids playing in more poorly lit parts of the parking lot. I wondered if this was what the parents of the kids expected when they let them come on this trip -- that the kids would have almost no supervision and would run around terrorizing the hotel while the adults got drunk in the lobby.
Well.
Pardon me while I fall to my knees and thank God that *I* wasn't the one suffering all this.
Pardon me while I fall to my knees and thank God that no kids were seriously injured.
Where to begin? Do I really have to say anything? Is there anything that I can add to this? Well, yes.
First of all, while I have no problem with a congenial glass of wine over a playdate, what could have possessed these adults to treat this as an opportunity to party hardy?
"Reminds me of the college kids who used to chaperone us at the beach," says Roger. Yes, the summer after his freshman year in high school Roger was allowed to trek off to Myrtle Beach in the company of several inebriated college students as chaperones. (Need I even mention the likelihood of our children being allowed similar indulgences? This from the man who is making plans to accompany his children on their honeymoons?)
I can scarcely add anything to this tale except to resolve, firmly, to myself in that secret little place in my heart where fairy tales can come true, it could happen to you-- RESOLVE: my children will never go on a trip like this without being in the company of trusted adults who refrain from multiple shots of tequila or many bottles of beer while the life of my children is in their keeping.
Approved beverages are lemonade, Diet Coke, coffee, unsweetened tea, and holy water.
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13 comments:
Holy sh*t. Did she get the school name? I'd call the school(s) & report the chaperones, for sure. I wouldn't for one or two drinks, but it sounds like these kids were running wild. I know of teachers who have lost their jobs because of much, much milder stuff.
They probably think what happens at the Holiday Inn stays at the Holiday Inn. It doesn't happen that way. If they aren't reported by the author, some kid will talk. They always do.
Honeymoon????? You're letting your kids get married someday? Wow, you're liberal.
Barbara, Mama to 4 chickies from China
Hi,
Just wanted to post that I happened upon your blog today and I enjoyed your writing. The pictures are wonderful also! Trish
i saw that post on one of my boys list. i know connor will never do an overnight thing unless i am one of the chaperones. poor boy!
Some parents just don't get it that they are PARENTS. This is not to excuse them but I've found its true.
Last year we stayed in a "children's hotel" i.e. kid friendly, milk on tap in the bar, high chairs/sterilizers etc. So what do LOTS of the parents do...let their kids OUT of the room at 5am to run wild in the halls so they could sleep.
Unbelievable...
That woman should have taken a video with her phone and pictures of the beer bottles, etc. And sent it to the newspaper in the high school's home town. I bet those parents trusted the adults to watch over their kids too.
I find in interesting that a lot of people have assumed this was a school-sponsored sports outing. The author didn't say. It could have been a club sports trip. In any event, it was probably very easy to find out what organization the group was affiliated with, be it school, club, etc, or at least the orgainzation who was putting on the tournament (who should, in turn, know). Once you know the name, town, etc. of the group they were with (or representing), it should not be much trouble to report it after the fact--even if they're in another state.
Photographing the guilty parties is a clever idea, and could probably be done innocuously, particularly with camera phones so prevalent.
Having been a scout leader, Odyssey-of-the-mind coach, chaperone on numerous school trips over the years, as well as a parent to kids participating in school-sponsored sports, I can tell you that each of these organizations had rules against drinking AT ALL while a coach, leader, or chaperone in charge of the welfare of others' kids. We had to sign releases promising that we would refrain from such behavior. As a parent accompanying my son's high school wrestling team to an out-of-state, overnight event, I witnessed the coaches diligently following these rules, refusing the offer of a drink of wine or a beer from another well-meaning parent.
Certainly it is possible that there are youth sports organizations that do not explicitly require chaperones to abstain from alcohol. But they should! This was child endangerment. I agree that it is one thing to enjoy a glass of wine in the privacy of your own in a playgroup situation (where the ratio of adults to kids is nearly 1:1 or at worst, 1:2), but quite another when one is officially (in loco parentis) responsible for other kids in this type of situation where the kids' parents are not present. And you know, even discounting the drinking aspect, this kind of inattention, and condonement of unsafe conditions is inexcusable.
For the hotel staff to say there was "nothing they could do" is a cop-out. I've been to numerous facilities where rules are posted regarding the presence of alcohol or glass containers near pools, quiet hours, etc--with consequences clearly stated (i.e., you can be asked to leave if you don't comply). And even when such rules aren't posted, I've been to facilities where guests have been reprimanded, asked to quiet down due to complaints from other guests. And yes, told that if they couldn't be quiet, they'd be kicked out.
Should anyone ever find themselves in this situation, the best thing to do would be to leave, and refuse to pay the hotel (if possible). What's often the case, though, is that when a community has such an event, all the hotels/motels in the vicinity are booked, and it's nearly impossible to find another place to stay. :(
At the very least, your friend should write to the hotel (and it's owners or the chain it belongs to, if applicable), and tell them what happened, and that she intends never to set foot in another of their facilities due to such an irresponsible policy.
That nasty yellow stuff is polluting the Midwest too (and my allergy ridden sinuses). Darn those trees!
We had an "incident" in Calif a month ago where the family in the room above us were training their kids to be high jumpers. Three complaints to mgmt did not help even though the manager actually went to their door and threatened to make them leave. After writing a letter to corporate upon our return home I now have a handy dandy coupon for a free night IN CALIF! Hello, I live in the Midwest and I have no intentions of EVER returning to LA. You might want to specify in your complaint letter that you would like a free night at one of their hotels in a city of your choice.
I'm with everyone here that it is appalling. Horrid. Unbelievable.
I would have done what many suggest: found out where they were from and reported it to their local newspaper. Preferably while still in the hotel so the paper could send a reporter to see it themselves. And definitely taek pictures so you can defend youreself when the idiot parents/coaches try to say that you are lying.
Absolutely ridiculous.
Amen to your resolve to not let children go on trips without checking out the chaperones or going yourself!
We are so old, that we both will be retired while Alyzabeth is still in grade school. Guess who will be her chaperones?
Alyson
I'm in G-ville and the pollen is killing me. Getting ready to send our paperwork for certification and that story already makes me nervous about school trips. How well I remember those high school spring breaks with college age chaperones!
heck in some states if it is a sports related field trip I don't think the drinking part is optional. I have friends who have wanted their kids to quit sports because of it.
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