....to quote a man who had his brains blown out while serving our country

I got to thinking about this the other day. I have a list of "Blog Inspiration Topics" to turn to when I'm feeling dry. But while I am feeling dry, I am going to solve the entire mystery of life on this planet and leave you a wiser, more enlightened person who is prepared to take on the universe and grow spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically. OK?

But that's not all! What else do we have for the contestants? After you read this post you will automatically wake up the next morning looking EXACTLY THE WAY YOU HAVE ALWAYS DREAMED OF LOOKING. After you do, please consider sending me a love offering via paypal. OH EM GEE!! I figured out how to install a real paypal button!! (see right hand column)

Okay, enough joking. But you know what I was just wondering? Remember all that hideous furniture that game shows used to give away? I wonder if anyone still owns theirs?

Life is not fair. And the first thing I need to say is that being able to type this on a computer, while my college & law school & Phi Beta diplomas are proudly displayed in my garage, means that I am one of the richest people on the planet.

And having my wonderful kids makes me one of the richest people....Oh COME ON. My kids spend their idle summer days dreaming up ways to divest me from my money. And every K-12 parent knows what August brings. The School Supply lists go up and your child reminds you that you need ONE GREEN ONE INCH BINDER WITH 8 MULTICOLORED TABS and ONE TWO INCH YELLOW BINDER and ONE THREE INCH ORANGE BINDER with a 3 punch pencil holder and SIX YELLOW HIGHLIGHTS and FIVE BOXES OF KLEENEX and THREE BOTTLES OF HAND SANITIZER and a JOURNAL (I've sent in 11 journals so far. None have ever been seen again) and, if you're pathologically cheap like me, you fight off the temptation to just gather up all the leftover crap from last year, spray the binders with Windex, and toss the whole seething mess in a box to take in on the first day.

I'm not getting very far with my theme am I?

I guess I just don't want to face it. Because it's not fair that life isn't fair. Every book, every movie, every porn video* I've watched on the internet has happy endings.

*Kidding, but I know of a guy who has porn running on one computer while doing business at home on another and the other day his boss asked him what was that moaning sound in the background (he had forgotten to mute the porn) and I forgot what excuse he gave his boss, but that's probably a good thing, because the first part of this is a true story.

Face it, I'm not going to solve a problem that has baffled the brightest minds through the ages except what about this?

What if reincarnation is real? (I believe).

What if you are allowed to choose how many challenges you take on while alive in order to face them and grow spiritually? (I believe).

Here's a weird story. I used to have a psychic that would do email past life readings. And I asked her to do one for a friend of mine. Now this friend had two kids, and adored them. He spoke of them constantly, spent every spare minute with them, and I would have voted him as Father of the Year without a second thought.

The psychic said that he had been a doctor in a past life around 1890, and his beloved sister died of a disease. He spend every minute at the lab trying to figure out how to cure the disease that took his beloved sister and neglected his own wife and children. He asked for a new life to correct this and learn to be a good husband and father. Soon after I sent him this (which he never mentioned to me ever and I didn't bring it up) he took a job which required him to be at work 100 hours a week. Soon he was divorced and took a position at an office in another country. Computers. Japan. His kids barely know what he looks like.

True story.

If you think all psychics are frauds, you're wrong. Only 99% of them are.

I believe that reincarnation is real and that you choose your challenge and try to meet it. Sometimes you do, sometimes you don't.

Well, okay, now that I've solved the problem that has baffled the greatest minds, I have a complaint/query/bitch/whinnne.

How come, when someone does you wrong, are you considered "whiny" "unprofessional" and "boring and pathetic" and "mildly annoying" if you want to talk about it?

(the above adjectives have been applied to me recently and it smarts. It stings.)

There are people who attempt to deal with hard things by talking them out on their blogs and they are constantly being criticized and mocked. I've done some of it myself. Privately. The only blogger I've ever called out in public is Dooce and that's because she insulted my kids. Oh, and Violent Acres kindly stated that I should have been aborted instead of adopted because I whined so much and also called my kid's teeth gruesome or hideous or something like that. Did it affect me? Do I remember it? I had them put braces on my kid's teeth when we could not pay our car & home insurance bill.

Oh go away, people who feast on other's stupidity, faults, and misfortune like hungry wolves after a kill. Go away. Shut up.

I am. I don't care how trippy and zen and hippie and wacko and gooney it sounds (and it sounds that way to ME). I'm tired of putting negative thoughts into the world.

I'm going to try to stop.