The SECOND Smartest Thing I Ever Did

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

The smartest thing I ever did.....

was marry Roger.*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA you didn't think I'd start the New Year with some sappy post about parenthood did you?

No, seriously.

I mean it.

Forsaking all others.

He's held up well, too, hasn't he?

Twenty years together..in April.

The second smartest thing I ever did....

started thirteen years ago.

I sent in a request to the Yewnited States Gubmint and asked for permission to adopt a kid from China.

Yeah okay, so that's a "twist."  But hey, what did you think it was going to be?  Buy a zillion dollar lottery ticket?

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The day that happens, I shall revise this post.

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I was way old.  Way too old to be a parent.  Way too old to chase a toddler around the room.  Way too old to pay for their high school yearbook with my Social Security check.

Oh well.  The poor kids got stuck with us anyway.

And yes....(insert sappy post laden with ladybugs and roses and lollipops and ecstatic praise for the two most remarkable kids in the universe).

We're lucky.

I don't know why I adopted.  Kids bored me.  Inane toddler chitchat bored me.   The responsibility was terrifying.  The financial burden has, at times, been almost intolerable.

When your kids hurt, you do want to hunt down and kill the offender.   

And the teen years start this year..in September, to be exact.

I'm not the patient, self sacrificing type who would happily accept a child with serious problems.  I was terrified of getting a child that strained my tiny amount of patience and small checkbook.   

 

I was terrified of becoming one of those people.  Yeah. The ones who do nothing but talk about kids until even their own spouses can't stand them.

To this day, I've never volunteered to babysit someone else's kid.

But.....(insert sappy prose about the joy of seeing them run around with their friends, filled with joy, and seeing them work together, laughing and bonding).

My advice is simple and free.  And worth just what you pay for it.

 

If you are 100% sure you don't want kids...don't do it.

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If you're lazy, poor, selfish, cheap, bored by OPC (other people's children), terrified of responsibility, fearful of watching your child get hurt, fearful of mental or physical problems your potential future child will have, scared you'll make the worst mistake of your life..

 

And yet there's a tiny voice in your head saying..."I kind of think I want a kid."

 

Don't do it.   (That's to avoid legal liability).

But know this. And kids, when you read this, as I know you will, you sneaky little darlings....

WE LOVE YOU MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF. 

*I was going through some of Mom's pictures and found this one snapped by my uncle. I've never seen it before. I keep wondering what I was saying.  Maybe, "do what I say and nobody gets hurt?"