I told my husband that I had advertised clueless in carolina on a big blog, ABDPBT, and hoped to get some new readers.
"Why haven't you posted, then?" he asked.
"Because....I have writer's block....." I stammered. "I can't think of a story that will properly illustrate my um, unique personality, and endear myself to millions so you can quit your job and I can hire you.
Well, I can see that would be some pressure," he mused. Let's watch a movie."
The trailer for Coming Home started to creep across the screen and I had my inspiration.
"AAAARRRGH!" I screamed, cowering. "The most embarassing moment of my ENTIRE dating career."
"It must have been a doozy," he observed wittily. (insert air quotes besides wittily)
"It went like this," I began, while he drew up a chair by the fire.
"I was 19 when it came out, a shy, virtuous, pure young lady who was a sophomore in college. I was very naive...."
The basic story of Coming Home is this: Jane Fonda is married to a real, like uptight, Army dude in Vietnam. While he is away she falls for a disabled paraplegic, Jon Voight, and after they fall in love there is this scene where she is hollering real loud and you don't see the guy's face and then Jane breaks up with her husband at the end and the husband kills himself by walking into the ocean.
I nudged my date during the scene when she is hollering real loud and you don't see the guy's face at all.
"What is going on?" I whispered.
He explained.
I nudged my date again during the scene when Jane's husband returns from Vietnam and commits suicide after walking into the ocean.
"What the heck is he doing? Going swimming?" I whispered.
He explained.
Fast forward two years.
We're swapping stories of the stupidest people we ever dated.
" Y'know"...he mused....." I took this chick to see Coming Home when it came out....and she kept asking me the stupidest questions. Like what was going on during the oral scene, and what happened at the END! Can you believe that!" he howled.
"What a moron!" I gasped.
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