Dear family & friends, (I include all you blog readers as friends, I hope that's the case and there isn't anyone out there waiting to stalk me in my weakened condition)Christmas 2006 was a little bit different. I'm recovering from a hysterectomy done on December 13, 2006 and they took both ovaries too because they were afraid I had ovarian cancer. I didn't. But there was a Thing there, a nasty little Thing, that isn't there now.
I haven't talked about on the blog. I guess I felt a little ashamed of it because it's a Female Problem and I just couldn't bear the thought of my clients & opposing attorneys with senses of, um "humor" finding this one day and a huge Powerpoint presentation flashing on the courtroom walls..."SO ANYWAY ABOUT MY OVARIES." But you know what? I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of being cheerful and brave and peppy. It's not like I have Something Ominous Derived From Behavior You Wouldn't Tell Your Mother about, y'know?
Briefly, the surgery itself was a snap. A snap! I am a health fanatic and my body bounces back very quickly. I was off pain pills in 2 days and doing laundry without any problems in a week.
Then I entered the wonderful world of Surgical Menopause. That means that all the normal healthy hormones pumping away were yanked out. That means you have to put them back, and get them balanced, and it takes months. Months that I still have to work and run a home and occasionally pat my child on the head while I'm lying down, dead tired.
It's been rough. Very rough. Artificial hormones fluctuating in the body make your body do things like develop horrible joint pain. The new artificial hormones have to "settle down." They want a new paint job, and they don't like the curtains in their new guest room, and they've been letting me know about it with crippling agonizing bouts of pain that then leads to crippling agonizing bouts of depression, and tears, and exhaustion.
Things are getting better, slowly. It takes time.
If you pray, would you say a quick one for me?
But I have to remember. This is all temporary.
I'm not dying of cancer.
This is a good, good thing.
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35 comments:
So sorry to hear this! But so glad you're not dying! Be gentle on yourself, and I hope you're feeling 100% real soon! I also hope you have lots of people helping you out and taking care of you!
(((((((Clueless)))))))
I've been thinking about you, and noting your absence. I'm glad to hear things are better than initially feared and sorry to hear you're having a rough time. I'll be thinking of you.
I am sending good vibes your way to get those hormones in order.
I am sending good vibes your way to get those hormones in order.
Yes, not dying is a very good thing! Hope you are feeling better soon.
I am happy to hear that the outcome was positive even though right now the 'mones are making you moan. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Hope things settle and you feel better soon.
Keep smilin!
Yay for the good news, boo for the hormone fluctu.. flucku.. levels. I'll say a prayer and hope this leveling-out time passes quickly for you. (((hugs)))
Egad!!!!!! Glad there was some very good news in there - congrats for that. Take care of yourself.
Hope you are back to your old (not age wise) self in no time. Glad the news is good now on the not dying part though...
Such a beautiful family you have!! I feel your pain on the outting of your female issues. I am in constant fear that a law student or professor will find my blog. At some point, I decided to run the risk because the blog is so helpful for me in working out some key issues in life. Thanks for acknowledging your concern.
I'm glad the surgery worked, and sympathize deeply about the hormones. You and the docs will figure out the right balance soon.
Thinking of you, Lorrie...
Thoughts and prayers coming your way. Glad to hear that you got through the surgery part with flying colors. I hope that you and your doctor can find that tricky balance for you very, very soon.
P.S. Love the annual picture!
Awww Clueless....I hope ya will feel better soon.
I hope you feel better soon! I am glad there wasn't ovarian cancer. And hopefully the hormone adjustment will be fast.
Take care, Lin
Hope things level off soon and you are feeling better again. Having spent a week on the sofa after a vasectomy I can sympathize. Getting your plumbing messed with is no fun, especially for a woman. Regardless of cause, abdominal surgery is abdominal surgery.
I'm also sorry that anyone should be rude or mean or condescending - or that you should be worried about someone being etc. - to you about "female trouble". What the heck was all that Enlightenment and literacy and indoor plumbing about, then, if not an attempt to prod us into seeing people as people and health as health and away from the idea that things relating to female plumbing were icky, bad and scary?
Get well soon...
Lorrie
I am so sory that you have been having such a rough time. And at the same time - I am feeling so happy that you aren't dying of cancer. If there is anything that I could do, please don't hesitate to email me. cheesy cyber hugs and good juju being sent your way. Please take care of yourself, and maybe have an extra chocolate chip cookie now and then (for a quick energy boost/sugar high). ((((((((good juju))))))))))
Oh yeah. Not having cancer is a good thing. Good luck getting those hormones stabalized; now your kids can say, "Mom, do you need to take one of your little green pills?" Like one of my friends use to say to her Mom when she got a little cranky.
Not dying of cancer *is* a good thing...but I'm so sorry for all you're going through. I do pray, so I'll make sure to include you in the nightly rounds. Please take care...
xo
oh, it does indeed suck and I will send all the good thoughts I can for stable hormones, soon soon soon.
Not having cancer, that is a pretty damned good upside... and you'll really believe it when your hormones are stable enough for you to think about it for more than 12 seconds straight before you fall asleep.
In the mean time, we will all be happy as hell for you, because you not having cancer is a very happy thing indeed.
I hope your recovery continues to go well. Best wishes for the hormones straightening out soon.
Long time lurker,
Glad to hear you're going to be fine. Hope your hormones settle down soon. Great holiday pic.
Melissa
Hopefully only 1 more day before I see my daughter's face.
Lurker in Carolina...
I'll be praying for you.
Love your great sense of humor.
Eeee! Sounds rough with all the adjustments. But so glad you are on the mend so quickly otherwise. I just hope those recaltruent hormones settle down already! You can yell a "don't make me come back there!" for me.
I'm sorry to hear about your surgery, but am glad that you are doing well. You are in my prayers.
Will definitely say an extra prayer for you. My SIL had similar surgery a year ago at age 42 for early stage endometrial cancer. She is an a-mom too-two from Korea. She and I have decided to ask the Big Cheese (God) for a rebate on our reproductive organs someday (me with 3rd mc. this fall-dd from China)-or at least a rebate on all the money spent on feminine hygiene products.I'll count you in on the rebate!
Hang in there. Glad to hear you are recovering well physically from the surgery.
Yes I pray and I will definitely say one for you -- that you are back to feeling like yourself again soon!
But, I am so glad it was NOT cancer. You are right, this stuff is temporary (thankfully)
Very, very glad your not dying of cancer but feeling so sorry for you. With time I hope everything balances out and you feel back on top form. This must be really a rough time for you, sending lots of good thoughts your way.
Goodness. I'm glad you said something, and doubly glad it wasn't cancer. We just lost Molly Ivins and can't lose you! Hope the hormones settle down soon.
Wow! I am very sorry to hear your news and have heard that what you are going through is the WORST. I am glad things seem to be getting a bit better but wanted to add my sympathy.
Hang in there and do not be ashamed to ask for help. This is not an easy thing and you deserve anything you can do to help make the transition go smoother.
Wow, thanks for sharing your pain. You have such a wonderful humourous writing style that one woudl never know that you had been suffering so. It is ok to be vulnerable sometimes. I hope the hormonal stuff settles soon, it is tough right now, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.
I know of what you speak. I had uterus & ovaries removed Oct 25th. The hormonal roller coaster sucks. When I use up all the free samples of oral hormones my doc gave me, I am going to try the patch. Which do you use? The patch is supposed to be lots better at keeping your levels even throughout the day. However, knowing my crappy insurance provider, I will probably have to pay through the nose to get it. Seems they only pay for the cheapest med available. Take Care!
I'm using the Vivelle Dot. I like it a lot. There is some evidence that oral hormones increase insulin resistance=weight gain=risk of diabetes, etc. I highly recommend the Vivelle Dot!
"Months that I still have to work and run a home and occasionally pat my child on the head while I'm lying down, dead tired."
That my dear, is not just hormones--its the damned surgery. Seems like cutting out parts of ones self takes alot out of you, even if the stitches part looks fine.
I had a hysterectomy in December 30, 2004 but kept the ovaries yet, like you, at the end of the day, I was also one darned exhausted person.
I was sooooo frustrated---I am a lawyer, used to running full bore and having lots of energy. And yet, here was my body, totally betraying me and wanting to take a nap or wait for the bus instead of walking five blocks. Blech.
It took months [like June/July of 05] before I was no longer tired and truthfully, I think it was a full year before I felt fully normal.
hang in there and let yourself rest. It takes longer to heal than you think--I found a lot of good information on the hystersisters website if you haven't already checked it out.
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